Atmosphere: A Love Story By Taylor Jenkins Reid - 49

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Joan is sitting at her console in Mission Control and she cannot breathe. Her body has stopped taking in air as an involuntary process. Instead, every few seconds, she gasps and abruptly exhales. And then holds her breath again. It’s been happening for the past half hour, as everyone in Mission Cont...

Joan is sitting at her console in Mission Control and she cannot breathe. Her body has stopped taking in air as an involuntary process. Instead, every few seconds, she gasps and abruptly exhales. And then holds her breath again.

It’s been happening for the past half hour, as everyone in Mission Control has tried to figure out how to address the unprecedented insubordination of the only conscious astronaut aboard a damaged shuttle.

Jack and the rest of the team have resigned themselves to what Joan knew well before Vanessa said it.

“We have no choice but to support the premature deorbit,” Jack announced when Vanessa got into the airlock against orders. “And do what we can to ensure that Navigator survives reentry under the current conditions.”

Right now, there are teams of engineers trying to calculate to what percentage the shuttle can withstand reentry with the vague specs Vanessa has reported.

And Joan is sitting at her console, trying to catch her breath.

She has never experienced this in her body before.

But she’s also never sat in a chair and pretended she was only worried about losing a colleague when, really, her entire life was at stake.

They have to start the deorbit burn in the next few minutes. All of the final preparations are being made. Joan looks around the room as she gasps again.

Antonio has come onto the floor. He is standing to the right, with both hands behind his back, looking up at the telemetry.

He looks at her and nods, his eyes glassy. From his frown, she can tell he is worried about her.

She feels so much anger. At him. At the shuttle. There is a tiny spark of fury building to a bonfire within her.

But more than that, she has never felt sustained terror like this before, as if she is falling with no end. Her pulse beating against the confines of her neck.

But no one needs her anger and terror and panic right now. They need her composure.

They need her to be CAPCOM.

When Vanessa gets home, Joan is going to scream at her with such venom she might go hoarse. Then she will fall into her and sob.

But for now, she will be the CAPCOM Vanessa Ford needs.

She can do that for her. She has to do that for her.

It is the only real way to love her.

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