The Scammer - 37

Spring at Frazier brings a different kind of energy. A change in the air mixed with the pollen and heat, the thrill of something

new. The cherry blossoms are blooming puffs of white and pink, the sky powder blue. The euphoric rush tackles everyone on

campus with a blissful high. Or it could be the end of finals that’s giving us all the giggles. I finished my last final a

few hours ago, redeeming my academic standing.

Nick and I stroll hand in hand through the Quad, heading for the Rec, as workers set up chairs and wooden bleachers, facing

a massive graduation stage.

“This is gonna be us in a few years,” Nick says, nodding at the stage decked in our school colors. “Then, law school for me

and an MFA in creative writing for you.”

I sigh. “It’s gonna be so weird.”

“What do you mean?” he asks, curious.

“I don’t know. We’ll be real adults in the real world. We won’t have this to look forward to every day.”

He nods, his face growing serious. “I know. We’ll have to interact with white people again on a daily basis.”

I laugh, giving him a playful shove. He stops in the middle of the Quad to kiss my forehead, trailing down to my nose, then

my lips, fingers gripping my new microbraids.

But it’s true. Some people don’t ever want to give this up. Some people try to stay in college forever. It makes me think

of Emancipation. Devonte really had a plan to build a utopia for himself on the backs of college students. How many colleges

would he have hit if they weren’t stopped? What would he have become?

“Hey, have I told you how proud I am of you?”

I gaze up at Nick and chuckle. “What? Where’d that come from?”

“I don’t know, just thinking back on everything that’s happened this year. You came to college, the one your brother wanted

you to. You made friends, even if they were insane. After all that, you kept going. You handled your grief better than I ever

could. Even with the trial coming up, you’re ready to face your fears. And I just can’t get enough of you.”

He nuzzles my neck and I swallow down the guilt burning my throat. As the new trustee, Nick is lobbying for more mental health

programming and stricter rules on dorm visitation. I tell myself that one day, I’ll tell Nick the truth. I just hate the idea

of him knowing what I gave up for revenge. Or who I gave up. It doesn’t taste as sweet, mostly sour.

Vanessa’s trial will start in the fall. Alongside the trial of the two officers who murdered an unarmed man. Both predators on the Black community, just in different ways. Loren agreed to be a witness. She dropped out of school to move back home to New York. I wasn’t surprised by this. People were more surprised that I wanted to stay at Frazier. And why wouldn’t I want to be around such Black excellence? I’m even in Dr. Barnes’s class next year.

Despite my parents’ offer to buy me my own condo, I decided to move into another dorm. I want a chance at starting over, making

new friends. No way to do that holed up alone in an apartment. Besides, Nick plans on getting his own place so I’ll be staying

there often. We still don’t sleep well without each other.

Mom came down to help decorate my new room, a single with its own bathroom. We made up for lost time shopping. She even sat

in for a group therapy session. The possibility of losing another child made her drop all expectations.

On the Quad, sororities and fraternities are stepping, and a few students turn up their music on a bench, dancing. A professor

passing by stops to chat, laughing along with them. I remember while touring Yale, a group of boys dressed in khakis and blazers

tossed around a Frisbee on the old campus grounds, a spitting image of my high school. Looking out today, I can only laugh

at the striking difference.

Dad still doesn’t understand how I can choose Frazier over Yale. He’s just never experienced the glorious energy of truly belonging. He’d rather continue fighting for a seat at a table that won’t serve him.

Everyone knows that monsters are real, that they don’t just live on the outskirts of our imaginations with the tooth fairy.

What we were never told, never fully explained, is how the monsters can roam among us, hidden in plain sight, with nice teeth,

gorgeous skin, and breathtaking smiles. How they have the power to manipulate, the power to persuade, the power to siphon

the life out of you.

I want to believe that Kammy is still alive, somewhere. That Legacy is just back home with his family and lost his phone.

But Vanessa refuses to talk and Devonte is out there, floundering without her helping to plan their next score. I don’t know

what the future holds for Nick and me once he learns the truth. But there’s one thing I know for sure:

Kevin would have loved it here.